Sunday, February 29, 2004

fight or flight

so, last night on the subway, i had an "incident." let me first give a little background on the subway in Boston, otherwise known as "the T." it's very convenient and pretty fast. actually, i have no idea what i would do without it because it's not how i get everywhere. but specifically, my route from home to school and vice versa is not the best route on the T. it goes through some bad neighborhoods, though my neighborhood itself is safe. in general, i enjoy riding the T, as it gives me time to read but at the same time, safety could definitely be improved. read below.

now, on to the story. i was coming home from downtown around 8:30. not even late, but late enough, i guess. as i sat down on the train, a drunk man sat right next to me. he reeked of alcohol and could barely sit up straight. now, the normal person would have probably moved, but i don't know why i didn't. then, he started talking to this couple sitting on the other side of him. they got off at their stop, which is when he turned his attention to me. as he's teetering back and forth on the train, he's asking me to come home with him. i look around the train and no one can look me in the eye. not the two guys a few seats away. not the one big guy sitting across from me. but who i do see is an MBTA (mass bay transportation authority) person. that's when my fight or flight mechanism went whack. again, he asked me to come home with him. i looked him straight in the eye and said, "NO." (it wasn't a timid "no" but a rather strong one) he then kept on asking me and coming closer to me. if the MBTA worker hadn't ocme over and told him to get off of the train, i woulda pushed him down. yeah, he was bigger than me and yeah, i'm stupid, but somehow, i wasn't so much scared as i was ready.

well, so, he got off the train with the MBTA employee and probably just got sent off on his way. strangely enough, or rather unfortunately, this is not my first, or second, encounter with a threatening man on the subway. first, it was a man who threatened a group of friends and i with a gun he supposedly had in his bag. second, it was a drunk guy who again tried to approach me.

why am i telling this story? i have no idea. it was a strange feeling last night as i was walking the two blocks from the subway to my apartment. i felt as though i had just survived something, yet that i had gone temporarily insane. why did i not feel afraid of this man? why did i speak up to him so strongly? what would i have really done if no one stepped in? and why do none of the men in boston have any guts to help someone who was obviously in a not-so-good situation?

yeah, so that's my story from last night. then, i studied anatomy and watched pretty in pink. wow, my saturday nights are just rockin'.

Friday, February 27, 2004

mass chaos

i had a great conversation with my dad tonight about politics and such. i'm an official massachusetts resident now. my justification for changing my residency status was so that i could vote without doing absentee. also, i want to feel more comfortable here in boston and part of that, for me, is voting. also, i have this totally odd delusion that one day when i'm before congress for confirmation (see, i plan on being appointed to some high level cabinet position someday and that requires being confirmed by the senate), they will look at my voting record and ask me, "how could you have voted in california if you lived in massachusetts for four years?" yeah, totally delusional, but that's my thought process. but, see, i did not think of the possibility that i would have to do my taxes in massachusetts and could no longer depend on my parents' tax preparer. also, i did not consider that maybe residency programs will look at my state of resident. so, i think i will change it back to california. i'm such a dork. this whole paragraph is one, long, convoluted way of sharing something that no one but myself had any interest in knowing!

oh, but again, talking to my dad. we were talking about california politics. boxer is up for re-election and several republicans are running against her. i haven't been keeping up with california politics much (other than realizing that every policy that's been publicized by Schwarzennager is beyond absurd), so i feel as though i'm disconnected from california.

it's odd that my connection to a certain state or location is through politics. in california, i knew the city council members, mayors, attorney general, etc etc. here, i know nothing. i don't even know my city council member. so, i'm in this current state of limbo, whereby i don't feel personally attached to boston or massachusetts, yet i'm slowly feeling myself becoming disconnected from san francisco and california. i guess it's not a huge personal crisis (unlike anatomy), but it's still an odd feeling. i guess i'm just bringing it up now because super tuesday, when many big states (mass and california included) hold their presidential primaries, is this upcoming tuesday. i plan on casting my first vote as an official massachusetts-ian (i don't even know what they refer to themselves as) that day. as for who that vote will be, i'm unsure. i'm still undecided. i think i agree more with kerry on the issues, but edwards does have an arguably better chance against bush.

i'll try to inform myself between now and then, while trying to study for an anatomy exam. i can do it. i'm a medical student. i have super powers.

Wednesday, February 4, 2004

interesting night tonight

so, the full moon makes me a little wild. summary of today:
* ran to surprise a friend in the library. he turned around and the surprise was ruined. but, lo and behold, he had no idea i couldn't stop. effectively ran into him. he then told me to lay off the coffee - that is, if i drank coffee
* took an anatomy exam
* failed an anatomy exam
* went shopping - bought nothing but dinner
* ran into cute dental while shopping. he's hot
* effectively scared all my roommates, especially one last night that witnessed a conniption over tupperware without lids

oh, but i have something significant to post about. as i was on the subway tonight, there were a group of teenagers that were harassing a mentally ill older gentleman. i really was sitting there, watching them harass him. i couldn't do anything (i may be idealistic, but i'm realistic. i realize that i - a short little woman - cannot defend myself against a group of big teenage boys), but i wanted to do something more than just sitting there. i just wish that i could just show everyone that even if you don't like someone or that someone is different, you should respect them. does no one teach teenagers respect? this is not the first time that i have witnessed something like this on the subway. it's a sad, sad world that we live in. it's funny because i never saw it while riding the train in san francisco. maybe it's a matter of culture or geography. maybe it's a matter of age (though i doubt this as i've seen people my age and older acting the same exact way). i don't know. sometimes i just wish i could knock some common sense into people. [i apologize for this random, incoherent post - i just took a huge exam and cannot think right now.]

sorry, random post. blame it on the full moon. blame it all on the full moon. i tend to go a bit crazy. well, a bit crazier.

Sunday, February 1, 2004


it's an interesting weekend. pats just won the super bowl. i studied ALL weekend. really, i did. i studied at least 8 hours today and for 8 hours yesterday. i guess this is what i signed up for when i wanted to be a medical student, but boy, it's more than i expected. also, i hope to do very well in anatomy, so we'll see what happens.

i don't know what to comment on for now, as there's not a lot going on. oh, bird flu. so, i'm planning on going to vietnam this summer as part of my public health degree. i'm very very very excited, as i was supposed to go last year but cancelled my plans because of SARS. however, this year, this damn bird flu shows up. bird flu? will i cancel my plans because of bird flu? nope. i refuse to. i've waited long enough to go to vietnam. though i did doubt this decision after i learned that a 23 year old female recently died because of bird flu. that scares me, but obviously not enough. am i crazy? maybe so, but not for just this reason (for the fact that i know the california state fossil, maybe).

sorry, that was a rather boring post. sorry to waste your time. i take input on what to post on. i have opinions, i swear. i'm just kind of brain dead right now. all i know is anatomy. i know that the common extensor tendon of the forearm originates at the lateral epicondyle of the humerus while the common flexor tendon of the forearm originates at the medial epicondyle of the humerus. does this make any sense to you? if so, you need a life. i've already signed mine away, so escape while you can.